Posts Tagged ‘love’

Today we have a guest post from my friend Ram Gangliani from Right Selection in Dubai. Their philosophy of using love in their business has made them one of the most successful organisers of inspirational learning events in the the region.


Ram and Gautam Ganglani have transformed Right Selection into a premier training and motivational enterprise by following the philosophy that you will be happy and successful  in your life in direct proportion to the degree to which you will be helpful to the world.

How has Right Selection evolved over the last decade while serving the needs of the  business community?

When Right Selection was launched in 1993, the distribution of business management books, video training programmes and motivational audios was our core business. Over the years, as we evolved, we started providing our clients with cost-effective solutions to their training needs. Client demand led us to link up with top-class international speakers, trainers and consultants like Ron Kaufman, Steve Lundin, Tony Buzan, Bob Urichuck, Omar Khan and Keith Usher specialising in leadership and management skills. Our team of experts is sourced worldwide and we have a few trainers stationed in the UAE. Although we began as a father and son operation, we are now expanding with alliances and partnerships locally and in the G.C.C. as well as adding new members to our team.”

Do you have any mentors from whom you draw inspiration to run your affairs?

We have drawn a lot of inspiration from a few premier thinkers on leadership in business and in life.  Stephen Covey, Tom Peters, Ron Kaufman, Anthony Robbins and Robin Sharma are amongst those whose guidance has helped us create the personal lives we have always wanted whilst at the same becoming stars in the sector of training and education that we have chosen.

What would you say is the secret of your business strategy for success?

It is no longer a secret, but we have found ourselves using love as a business strategy. This could perhaps be the most unique factor contributing to our success. We have found that we can get everything we want out of life when we focus on helping those around us get everything they want out of life. Massive success in business really is all about human connections. Business success comes from having thoughtful conversations with our teammates, customers and prospects. If we stop engaging in these conversations, we lose the business.

What exactly are human connections? 

As Robin Sharma says, “They’re the bonds that link us, person to person. Human connections occur when we genuinely try to serve other people and make a difference in their lives – when we learn how to communicate from the heart, speak our truth, and sincerely become empathetic listeners, getting behind the eyeballs of those we’re listening to in an effort to understand them. Communication is so essential to showing leadership in your career.” In short we need to make a special effort to show people that we cherish and understand them

How do your clients react to your unusual set of business standards?

Our clients have continued to support us year after year and remained embedded in our list of loyal clients. The fact that we more than doubled our business last year speaks for itself. What makes us happier is seeing the success of our clients who are benefiting tremendously from our variety of effective training programs and powerful learning tools.  Our ongoing initiatives have been instrumental in the development of the educating and learning culture amongst our clients. The result is – further enhancement in the relationship between bosses and employees..

As you look ahead, what do you see as your goals and vision for Right Selection?

We have realized that success is all about making a difference in the world.  And, for us to manifest abundance in our lives and success in our business, it is crucial that we become value builders. At the end of the day, that is what the voyage of life is all about…. To seek ways to enrich others, to improve the lot of those with whom we have the privilege of serving and doing business with. Our higher purpose is to help create great results for our customers and make a difference in their bottom lines.”

You can follow Ram’s blog at http://ramganglani.blogspot.com/

Right Selection are bringing Brian Tracy to Dubai in October – this is an unmissable event if you want to move your life forward rapidly! Check out the Right Selection website for more info and booking!

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I’m not a huge fan of Twilight – I got about 100 pages into the first book and got bored with all the teenage angst. I did it for real many years ago and have no need to go back!

But this is a fabulous piece of music. Enjoy!

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There are three kinds of energy that we can work with in the world.

The first is vibration – we don’t really work with this, its just there, everywhere. Everything in the universe vibrates, even the very coldest thing.

The second is movement – when we add movement to a vibration we increase the level of vibration – we add movement by taking action.

The third is emotion – when we add the energy of emotion to a vibration we either speed it up – this is what we call a positive vibration like love, joy, happiness. Or we slow it down with hate, misery, fear.

Things are attracted to other things at the same vibration. So the more you add the vibration of love and joy, the more it attracts its own kind. And the reverse is also true.

More on this tomorrow…

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A while ago I was working with a client who was angry and stressed about the way the world was treating him. Now this is a delicate situation for coaches – if I sympathise, or even empathise with him I might make him feel better temporarily but I can’t really help him change his results. But if I tell him the truth – that the reason the world is treating him badly is because he is angry and stressed, not the other way round, I am likely to get thumped! The key is to break the news to him gently!

It is one of the most difficult concepts to understand but one of the most critical. Even once you get it, actually acting on this knowledge consistently can be a real challenge and takes time to master. But it is worth it because once you do, things can change very quickly for the better.

Here’s my understanding of it: Your thinking changes the way you feel, the way you feel changes the way you act, and the way you act changes your results and your results dictate the way you feel. Its one big circle. Most people try to solve life’s challenges at the level of action – by changing the things they do. But that is almost never effective long term. To create real lasting change you have to start with your thoughts.

Now most people allow their results to dictate the way they feel. For example, someone treats them badly, they get angry at being treated badly and react in a negative way, because they are angry they treat the next person badly and the negative re-actions produce negative results and they get more angry. Its not unreasonable, we’ve all done it. The problem is it doesn’t work!

When you allow things that have happened in the past to dictate your feelings now, you are ensuring that those feelings from your past create your results in the future. Which means that changing your results is virtually impossible.

So what’s the solution? The answer is to flood your mind with as much positivity as you can. Listen to upbeat music. Surround yourself with images of the things you want in your life and the people who love and inspire you. Make a vision board!

Spend time with positive people who are achieving great results. The bigger the group the better – you won’t all be achieving fantastic results all the time but you can help keep each other lifted all the time. Create or join a mastermind group .

Write a gratitude journal every day and carry it around with you so you can go to it quickly when life is getting to you and remind yourself what’s wonderful in your life.

But most importantly learn to control your thinking. This takes time and practice but don’t give up. You are a powerful, intelligent human being, you can be the master of your own thoughts. Even if your reaction in the moment is a negative one, you can make the decision to control your response instantly. For example, if you are driving down Sheikh Zayed Road (the main motorway through Dubai) and someone tries to cut you up, your instant reaction will probably be fright, followed quickly by anger. If you act on the anger you are almost certainly going to make the situation worse, but if you take a deep breath and send feelings of love and peace out to the other driver you will (yes, I promise you will!) feel better and carry on your day in a positive way.

By the way, if you think its too hard to send out feelings of love and peace just try to visualise the look of utter confusion on the reckless driver’s face as he gets bombarded by love and peace instead of the anger he was expecting!

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Its our wedding anniversary today so this is going to be quick! I can’t believe 18 years have passed since our fabulous wedding in Rhu. Some people say you never enjoy your own wedding but ours is still the best wedding I’ve ever been to! So this is dedicated to my wonderful husband, thank you for being there for the past 18 years, I’m looking forward to the next 18!

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As Chris said in her comment yesterday, we can’t always completely avoid negative people. And lets face it, all of us go through negative phases at some points in our lives and it wouldn’t make us feel very good if all of our friends went into hiding every time that happened!

So what we do need to do is learn to protect ourselves from those nasty negative vibes!

The easiest and most effective way to do this is to constantly be projecting love and good will. If you’re always sending it out, then its like a tidal wave of positive energy moving out from you so the negative energy is pushed away. The best scenario is that your positive energy affects them and dispels their negativity. But what you might also find, as a positive side effect, is that the negative people are repelled by you so you don’t have to feel guilty about avoiding them!

Now, I admit that with some people that’s just too hard! So if you can’t bring yourself to send them positive energy (yes, we are all human!) then try putting yourself in an imaginary bubble and tell yourself the bubble is impervious to negative energy but happily absorbs the positive. This method is especially effective if you have to speak in front of a crowd of strangers, especially if you think they might be hostile for whatever reason. I once had a client who often had to speak at press conferences for a particularly unpopular politician and she used this technique all the time. She reckons it saved her sanity on many occasions! And it doesn’t have to be a bubble – one client uses a bright yellow raincoat, another uses a suit of shining armour. And a friend, who will forever remain nameless, uses a giant condom! Just find something that works for you and makes you feel protected.

Another way is to take in reinforcements. Two positive people can usually create enough good energy between them to fend off any negative vibes and you can even make a game of it – think of yourselves as a pair of Jedi Knights fighting the Darth Vaders of doom and gloom!

And finally the best and simplest way is to smile! Even if you don’t feel like it studies have proved that putting a smile on your face does reduce stress hormones and it actually doesn’t matter if the smile is fake, it still works. But the nicest thing about a smile is it is infectious, eventually the toughest most resistant people will crumble under its power!

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A friend pointed out to me last night how well this goes with Carl Sagan’s Pale Blue Dot so here it is:


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Oh how I wish that was true! Wouldn’t life be so much simpler?

The truth is that in order to succeed you need energy, commitment, hard work, connections, knowledge and experience and, since we live in the material world, probably even money as well.

But while its not true that all you need is love, it is true that love is the one thing that every project must have if its going to succeed. Love, and its active partner, passion, are the energising forces which take us from effective to phenomenal. If you love what you do you will manifest success more powerfully and more quickly, you will magnetise the people you need to you and you will repel the people who might hold you back.

If you put the energy of love into everything you do, success will come more easily, but don’t ever think that means you can get away with not doing the work!


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This is one of my all time favourites! I hope it makes your spine tingle like it does mine. Enjoy!

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Following on from yesterday – here’s a few more thoughts on relationships:

Love is hard work! Anyone who believes that love should be easy sailing all the time has watched too many movies and read too many fairy tales! The truth is that if you are planning to be with one person for the rest of your life, there are going to be times when you could quite happily strangle them! In fact my Great Aunt, who has been married for 65 years said one of the reasons she had stayed married for so long is she had never figured out how to kill my uncle and get away with it! I think she was joking! But she has a point. It is simply not possible to maintain a level of Valentine’s Day romance for 65 years and sometimes love can go into reverse! And if you expect this you can be prepared to deal with it, but if you believe that love is a “happily ever after” fairy tale then you’re in for a shock!

One of the most important principles in any long-term relationship is commitment. And I know that’s a pretty old fashioned principle these days but I believe that if you are committed to making it work, then you will put effort into finding a way. Sometimes its easier to just walk away but who knows how many years of joy you are throwing away if you don’t make an effort to get through the rough patches. OK, I know some relationships are just not worth saving, but I also know that if there was something in your partner which made you say “I do” then that thing is probably still in there, just buried under all the nonsense that life throws at us. You only have to look at the number of people who get married, get divorced and then years later get remarried to the same person to know the truth of this.

Celebrate your differences!

Sometimes we expect our life partners to think exactly the same way we do, and to enjoy the same things we enjoy but honestly – how boring would life be if that were true? While its true that for a relationship to work we have to have some things in common, it is also true that opposites attract. It’s OK to disagree with your partner and more importantly, the reverse is also true! We need to embrace our differences and learn to love them, that’s what gives our relationships spice and an element of unpredictability, which is what keeps them fresh.

Over time everything changes. If you are planning to spend the rest of your life with someone, you need to recognize that you won’t be the same people 20 years down the line. Sometimes you will grow apart and sometimes you will grow closer. But change is the one constant in life and its important to recognize and enjoy this. If you can accept that everything changes and sometimes you will be changing at different rates then you can learn to manage that process. I have a client who used to be a corporate Rottweiller and is now a hypnotherapist! His wife really doesn’t know what’s happened to him and is sometimes struggling to remember the man she married – you see, she didn’t choose the change, he did. So if he wants the relationship to survive he needs to have compassion for her and wait for her to catch up. Its possible she never will, but she’s trying, so he needs to be gentle.

When I look at my family, which has a tradition of long marriages, I realise that it is all worth it. The shared happiness and yes, the frustrations and most importantly friendship of a long marriage are a very rare, and very special thing. Are you up for the adventure?

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