How Coaches Sabotage Success

I had a big “aha” moment yesterday while talking with a friend! We were talking about some business goals she had and how she kept getting so stuck in the detail that she never seemed to move any closer. In fact she is probably moving a lot faster than she realises, which is why doing the Wheel of Life exercise regularly is so useful because it gives you an immediate picture of how far you’ve come.

The problem is the business coach she is working with is really fantastic at revving people up and getting them all excited about the huge changes they can make in their lives when they are successful. And doesn’t that sound like a good thing? Well of course it is. Its great, until your Inner Reptile gets wind of it!

Remember, your Inner Reptile hates change! Even positive change is seen by him to be very scary and very dangerous. So when coaches remind you of your huge exciting goals, get you to focus on the amazing future you are planning, the big changes you are manifesting, what they are actually doing is scaring the bejeebers out of your poor little Inner Reptile. And what does he do when he’s scared? He takes over of course!

So the left brainers will get stuck in the detail. They won’t be able to move forward until every last minute thing is sorted, taken care of, label, filed, put away. They will have the tidiest desk on the planet, the best filing system and the most organised office. But they will still feel stuck.

And the right brainers will have no clue what the next step is, they will flap around doing lots of things, flitting from one project to the next with no real plan or structure because they are so fixated on the big picture. They can’t see the trees for the wood!

Any of that sound familiar?

What needs to happen is firstly to switch off the Inner Reptile – go for a walk or a swim or do some stretching, read a fun book or watch a silly movie or go out to play with friends. Once the reptile is back in his cage start to look at your short term goals. Forget the big exciting future for the moment, its still there, and, if you’ve done your planning properly it will not mind being ignored for a while! Look at where you need to be in 6 months. And if that’s still too scary look at where you want to be in one month, or even one week if neccessary.

Every step you take is one step forward into your exciting future. Take big steps when you can and little ones when you need to. Keep your eyes firmly focused forward on the next step. Because if you don’t take that step you can’t ever move forward. And if you, do you’re one step closer!